


The Pumpkin Spice-alypse

by crazycatt71



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Author has issues with pumpkin spice, Food, Humor, M/M, Marvel Spookytober Prompts 2020, Overwhelmed Bucky Barnes, Pumpkin Spice, Pumpkin spice everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:34:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27032776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazycatt71/pseuds/crazycatt71
Summary: Pumpkin spice, it's everywhere.Bucky realizes that pumpkin spice is everywhere and worries that the human race is doomed
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Clint Barton
Comments: 11
Kudos: 35
Collections: Marvel Spookytober Prompts 2020





	The Pumpkin Spice-alypse

**Author's Note:**

> For Marvel Spookytober Prompts  
> Day 15- "If I hear pumpkin spice one more time, I'm going to scream."

The pumpkin spice-alypse started so subtly, that Bucky didn't realize it was a problem. He first noticed it when his favorite coffee shop had a list of offerings. A pumpkin spice, caramel macchiato or a low fat, soy spiced latte just didn't sound that appealing, neither did a mocha or hot cocoa flavoured with the stuff. The tea didn't sound bad, if you were a tea drinker, he wasn't, and he wasn't real sure why you'd put pumpkin spice in apple cider when there was apple spice, but probably was good.

The most of baked good on the list sounded really good. Doughnuts, muffins, a cake with cream cheese frosting, something called swirl bread that looked like cinnamon bread, and cookies, all made with the spice, along with fudge, cheese cake, and assorted pastries.

The dinner down the street was advertising pancakes and waffles with pumpkin spice whipped cream and syrup.

The grocery store gave the next warning signs that the threat might be worse that he had thought. The in-store bakery had same type of offerings as the coffee shop. Most isles he went down seemed to have something pumpkin spice flavoured. Ice cream in the frozen food isle, coffee creamer, butter, something called pumpkin spread, and yogurt in the dairy section.

There was cereal, popcorn, Twinkies, Jell-O, canned frosting, marshmallows, and granola bars. Pop Tarts, he bought a box for Thor, the big man liked trying new flavours of the toaster pastry. He saw Rice Krispy treats, Oreos, and Kit Kats, that had him shuddering with disgust. Soda, wine and beer and something called sparkling wine, which was actually just carbonated grape juice.

He though the non food isles would be free of the stuff, he was wrong.

He saw shampoo, after shave, perfume, body wash, liquid soap, shower gel, body spray, body oil, bubble bath, deodorant, lotion, and lip balm in the personal care isle. The health food isle had protein shakes that he had to get for Steve because he wanted to see the look on his face when he tasted it.

He saw candles, air freshener, wax melts, scented oils, and potpourri as he walked past the seasonal section. He was starting to realize the human race might have a serious problem when he ducked down an isle to avoid a mom with a screaming child and saw stationary, ink pens, car fresheners, and pet shampoo. He was convinced they were doomed when he saw the pumpkin spice scented toilet paper. When he saw the poo-pourri toilet spray, spray in the bowl before you do your business he gave up all hope.

He nervously looked around as he headed back to the Tower, now that he knew to look for it, he saw pumpkin spice every where. Clint looked up as he hurried in to their apartment, the smile sliding off his face when he saw how frazzled Bucky was.

“What's wrong?” he asked, hurrying over to Bucky.

“Pumpkin spice,” Bucky groaned, “it's every where.”

Clint nodded sympathetically.

“I know it seems that way.” He said with a grin.

“You don't understand,” Bucky growled, grabbing him by the shoulders as he stared at him with wild eyes, “they scented the toilet paper and created something called poo-pourri. We're doomed.”

“It only seems that way.” Clint soothed. “It only lasts until December.”

Bucky took a shaky breath, December was only a couple months away, they could hole up in the tower and survive that long.

“Then peppermint takes over.”

The inhuman shriek that came out of Bucky was heard through out the tower.

Yes, the pumpkin spice scented [toilet paper](https://www.amazon.com/Pumpkin-bathroom-GUARANTEED-Bathroom-Fragrance/dp/B07W733Z1V) & the [poo-pourri](https://www.poopourri.com/products/pumpkin-chai) do exist.


End file.
